good news, typewriters, scooter love, and america fuck yeah!

::::My mom's fiance went to see a specialist last week, and he has been given a clean bill of health! Apparently the docs at Toledo over reacted and while he did suffer a pretty severe concussion, he should be okay in another 6 months! Apparently the aneurysms are not life threatening as the other doc had supposed, so as long as he doesn't fall down again, his brain will heal and he'll be able to go back to work when his family doc gives the okay. Huzzah!

::::I went to a rummage sale the other day and bought this totally sweet vintage smith corona typewriter for $5.




Isn't it the cutest?? I love the brown and green color scheme!

::::The clients decorated our front window at work with a patriotic/4th of July theme. It looks like Uncle Sam ate too many freedom fries after a raucous party and threw up some liberty all over our window. LuLz.

::::I have been pining over the cutest scooter for the last couple of months. It's a 2008 motofino 50QT2. It gets 110 miles to the gallon! Plus it looks kind of vintage which I like, and it's mint green! It's listed for $1500, but I'm hoping to get it for $1300. We'll see what happens.

In summary....

My last 3-4 weeks:

1)My mom's fiance fell and hit his head in their basement, resulting in him being life flighted to St. V's for bleeding in his brain. After a scan, the doctor also discovered aneurysms in his carotid artery on the right and left sides of his brain. So the wedding is postponed, there's going to be a major and highly dangerous surgery, and my mom's a basketcase.
2)One of our clients died unexpectedly.

3)My boss resigned, and there's absolutely no transition plan despite the fact everyone in upper management has known it was coming for months now. Result? A complete clusterfuck situation at work.
4)I went on vacation. Strange meats and copious amounts of booze were consumed, I finally got to go to an Ikea, and experienced all the charms of southern hospitality and culture, North Carolina style.

I had planned on writing a much longer post, but a few days went by and I lost my fervor. So here's some pictures instead:

Bubba's-The epitome of fine Carolinian dining!

Riding the pig at Bubba's!

We also ate at cookout where you can have a hamburger, shake, corndog, and bacon wrap all as one meal:

It's in biblebelt land, but the views were breathtaking.

Speaking of being in the BibleBelt, here's a great sign:

The End!

A writing exercise; per mark's request.

Mark asked me to post one of my writer's group exercises aeons ago, and I have finally gotten around to it. So.....enjoy!


What was the first CD (or record or cassette) you ever purchased? Write about the way that particular album made you feel then. Write about how it makes you feel now.

Bible Grand Slam Deluxe

::::Last friday we had an early easter brunch where I work. We did an easter egg hunt for the clients which was pretty cool. My coworkers and I were stuffing the plastic eggs with candy Thursday night, and they were giving me shit because I was only putting one piece of candy in each of my eggs while they were putting in three or four. Apparently it would be quite the travesty if people opened up their eggs to discover a lone chunk of chocolate inside.

Then I got a bright idea. Why not put veggies inside the eggs? Can you imagine if they opened them up and saw two baby carrots inside? They would shit a brick! It would be Awesome! It would be the greatest late April fools day joke ever! Unfortunately my boss didn't think my idea was as great as I did. :(

After filling all the eggs, it was time to hide them. My boss put all of hers in really obvious places, but C and I thought that they should have to work for it, so we put them in the most ridiculous places we could think of. Watching the clients search for the eggs was a trip. They were getting mad because they couldn't find any. It was great. After a while we started giving them hints. Apparently we forgot some, because we found a couple of the leftover ones this week.

::::Speaking of work, we've been doing some serious spring cleaning and the other day I found this gem:



Bible Grand Slam Deluxe
Ages: 7 and up
No. of Players: 1

Description:
Sharpen your Bible batting skills with this exciting game of fun Bible learning in a cyber baseball park that's fun for the whole family. The questions are ranked with the single questions being the easiest and the home run questions being the most difficult. Includes special "Teacher Feature" - add your own questions for customized "lesson" play.

Operating System: Windows

http://www.christiangames.co.za/

I think it's hilarious. I can't wait to go home and play it!

LOLLLLLLLLLLLL!

This will only be funny if you watched battlestar galactica:

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/obama_depressed_distant_since?utm_source=a-section

***ADDENDUM***
Do not read this link if you haven't watched Battlestar Galactica, there are spoilers! Sorry Mark! :(




Obama told aides he feels "like a cylon without a Resurrection Ship."

A boring post about my mom getting married.

Don't you hate it when life gets in the way of blogging? Maybe I need to get my priorities straight. :P

My mom is getting married in June, and she is driving me absolutely INSANE! Last week she called me five times to ask numerous questions about flowers, dresses, and cake. Apparently being married makes me an expert, and she wants to get my opinion on every single detail.

I told her that by the time it happens, she will be ready for it to be over. Take the easy way out and elope! LoL.

What's neat is that my mom is going to wear my wedding dress. At first I thought it was weird, but it's sort of like a reverse heirloom thing.

Here's what I've come to realize. Weddings are great in theory, but a pain in practice.

So good it had to be shared

John Keats Eats His Porridge

It was hot enough to blister
The red paint of his mouth.
But if he let it lie there, glistening,
then clipped segments from the circumference,
it slid down like a soggy bobsleigh.

Grey as November, united as the kingdom,
but the longer he stared into that dish of porridge
the more clearly he traced
under the molten sugar
the outline of each flake of oatmeal.

When milk made its slow blue-tinted leap from jug to bowl
the porridge became an island.
John's spoon vibrated in his hand.
The island became a planet.
He made continents, he made seas.

This is strange porridge.
Eat it all up.

By Adrian Mitchell